Essay Title: Loss and grief: Grieving allows us to heal, to remember with love rather than pain. It is a sorting process. One by one you let go of things that are gone and you mourn for them. One by one you take hold of the things that have become a part of who you are and build again. —Rachael Naomi Remen. MD 1966. Introduction In this essay I will outline the main theoretical models relating to loss and grief. I will show how these theories may support individuals within the counselling process. To demonstrate the above I will draw upon my experience and learning from classroom triadic practice, my counselling placement practice and my personal and professional development to date. During the process of which I will …show more content…
The major significance of the Kubler-Ross model is that it maps emotional responses of the individual’s journey through the changing landscape of the loss and grieving process. The counsellor can use this model as a guide to help navigate their client through the ‘roller coaster of change’ and the fluctuating emotional terrain of grief. J. William Worden sets out the 'four tasks of mourning' (Worden 1991). The four basic dynamic tasks are: • To accept the reality of the loss. • To work through the emotions associated with the loss. • To learn how to cope with practical tasks of living without the support of the deceased. • To find a new place in one’s emotional relationship with the deceased. These tasks relate to the ideas of denial, anger and grief, learning to cope’ and' relocating the deceased in ones mental and emotional life'. Worden refers to the work of Klass 1996, which challenges the notion of breaking the bond in order to let go of a loved one and form new attachments. Klass suggested a successful process of grief through bereavement was one which created a ‘continuing bond, compatible with other, new and continuing relationships’ (Klass 1996, In Machin. P44. 2011). Within all these theoretical standpoints, the theme and process of coming to terms with death and relationship could be regarded as the essence of an existential quest; one
Kubler-Ross, E and Kessler, D (2005). On Grief and Grieving, London: Simon & Schuster. p7-28.
The Two-Track Model of Bereavement is a model that states loss is conceptualized along two axes. Track I pertains to the biopsychosocial functioning in the event of a loss and Track II pertains to the bereaved’s continued emotional attachment and relationship to whoever is deceased. The effect of Track I is seen through the bereaved’s functioning, including their anxiety, their self-esteem and self-worth, and their depressive affect and cognitions. Noting the ability of one to invest in life tasks after experiencing a loss indicates how they are responding to the loss of the deceased. This Track is seen as an expression similar to one of trauma, or crisis. Track II holds that the bereaved has difficulty physically separating from the deceased. This can be seen in emotional, interpersonal, or cognitive ways. It is shown through imagery and memories that the bereaved experiences surrounding the deceased, whether positive or negative, as well as the emotional distance from them. These pictures in the bereaved’s head explain both the cognitive and emotional view of the person who has died (Rubin, 1999).
There are also many factors that influence these events and emotions such as personality, culture, religion, relationships, and the way in which the deceased passed away (Buglass, 2010, 44). Buglass (2010) refers to Stroebe and Schut’s “flexible” model of grief and explains that a person handling loss will experience lifestyle changes as a result of that loss. This is due to the dual manner of moving between grieving, and trying to come to terms with loss. This theory looks at grieving as a process that happens in everyday life. Other theorists, such as Freud, view grieving as a “solitary process” where mourners withdraw from the world around them and gradually deal with the loss they’ve suffered.
Grief is defined as a type of emotional or mental suffering from a loss, sorrow, or regret (Dictionary.com, LLC, 2010). Grief affects people of all ages, races, and sexes around the world. Approximately, 36% of the world’s population does or has suffered from grief and only a mere 10% of these people will seek out help (Theravive, 2009). Once a person is suffering from grief it is important to receive treatment. All too often, people ignore grief resulting in deep depression, substance abuse, and other disorders (Theravive, 2009). Grief counseling is very common and can be very helpful to a person in need of assistance. Grief counseling provides the support, understanding, and
Loss is a phenomenon that is experienced by all. Death is experienced by family members as a unique and elevated form of loss which is modulated by potent stages of grief. Inevitably, everyone will lose someone with whom they had a personal relationship and emotional connection and thus experience an aftermath that can generally be described as grief. Although bereavement, which is defined as a state of sorrow over the death or departure of a loved one, is a universal experience it varies widely across gender, age, and circumstance (definitions.net, 2015). Indeed the formalities and phases associated with bereavement have been recounted and theorized in literature for years. These philosophies are quite diverse but
The theme of parental mourning has been a universal one throughout the centuries. In the literature on bereavement, writers repeat certain themes, thoughts, and reflections; they talk of the powerful and often conflicting emotions involved in "the pain of grief and the
The first theory I will be discussing is the Continuing Bond Theory we covered in lecture. Continuing Bond Theory is about continuing a relationship with a loved one was has died, which helps enhance an individual’s life by continuing this bond (Class notes, 2017). When reading the group lossography I found many classmates who currently practice this theory. For example, a classmate describes the death of their grandmother who played a big role in their life. In their lossogrpahy, the classmate talks about the strong bond and close relationship with their grandmother. After the death of their grandmother, their family has created rituals by having created shirts in their grandmother’s memory, pillows made out of her shirts, and the family gathering together every year for the anniversary of her death (pg. 105). These rituals help keep and play a key role in the classmate’s relationship with their deceased grandmother. The grief theory applies to this example because this classmate engages in rituals every year to keep her grandmother in her memory and to help preserve the close bond they once had.
Death is inevitable. Death is unforeseeable. Death is unknown. One of the most difficult aspects of life is the prospect of death. In Lament for A Son, Wolterstorff reflects on the agony and lamentation of losing his son in a tragic accident (Wolterstorff, 1987). He explains the grief and pain associated with the death of someone close (Wolterstorff, 1987). One of the main themes present is the premature death of the author’s son, which alludes to the five stages of grief (Wolterstorff, 1987) (Kübler-Ross, 1972). The last stage is the stage of acceptance (Kübler-Ross, 1972). Death is possibly one of the most difficult things to accept and understand. Through the analysis of Wolterstorff’s Lament for a Son, this paper will attempt to understand finding joy in loss, the meaning of death in the light of the Christian narrative, and the role of hope in the resurrection.
A common struggle for many folks identify is trying to figure out how grieving is operationalized and whether they are doing it "right". "Doing it right" usually has two meanings for the person struggling with a loss. The first has to do with reaction - many folks spend a good deal of time trying to figure out whether how they are feeling in relation to the loss is normal. The second has to do with process - a desire for a blue print on how to go about grieving.
In this essay I will discuss what grief is and the kind of grief a client could experience. We will move onto attachment theory and its link as to why we grieve. I will then look at what tools are available for counsellors to support their clients through a normal or abnormal grieving process.
Worden also defends his point about the effectiveness of grief counseling with many qualitative research studies (p. 120-122). He gives a list to remind clinicians to better implement interventions. He uses a Parks study from 1998 which says not all mourners need therapy or counseling, and adding to this Neimeyer’s (2000) study states that grief is unique to each individual so counseling looks different in each setting. These studies help prove Worden’s argument that those at risk will benefit from interventions.
Grief is the act following the loss of a loved one. While grief and bereavement are normal occurrences, the grief process is a social construct of how someone should behave. The acceptable ways that people grieve change because of this construct. For a time it was not acceptable to grieve; today, however, it is seen as a necessary way to move on from death (Scheid, 2011).The grief process has been described as a multistage event, with each stage lasting for a suggested amount of time to be considered “normal” and reach resolution. The beginning stage of grief is the immediate shock, disbelief, and denial lasting from hours to weeks (Wambach, 1985). The middle stage is the acute mourning phase that can include somatic and emotional turmoil. This stage includes acknowledging the event and processing it on various levels, both mentally and physically. The final stage is a period of
Elisabeth Kubler Ross was a psychiatrist and revolutionizes how people view death and dying. She would listen to dying patients a give them a public form. She came up with five stages of grief. They stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. These stages are used universally.
In her seminal work on grief and grieving, Elisabeth Kubler-Ross introduced the concept now very well known as the Five (5) Stages of Grief, enumerated chronologically as follows: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. In this concept, Kubler-Ross explored and discussed the normative stages that people go through when they experience the loss of a loved one and feel grief as result of this loss. It is also through these stages that people are now more aware of their feelings and thoughts when experiencing grief and the loss of a loved one. While the stages of loss are mainly developed for grief experienced with the death of a loved one, it is a generally accepted framework in understanding feelings of grief when an individual experiences the loss of a significant individual in his/her life. The discussions that follow center on the discussion of Kubler-Ross' 5 Stages of Grief, applied in the context of the Story of Job in the Bible.
Grief is a normal and natural response to a loss, whether it is the loss of life, home, job, friendship or item. Though we often expect to grieve the death of a family member or friend, these other significant losses can also cause grief. This paper will address the loss, grief, and mourning of characters portrayed in the film “I miss you already”. The author will discuss how Worden’s four tasks of grief are experienced by these characters and how the mourning process unfolds. Noticeable is anticipatory grief, sudden grief, prolonged grief as well as normal grief. In addition, Dr. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’ five stages of grief are also evident within the story line. Portrayed as well are Margaret Stroebe and Henk Schut’s Dual-Process model , which is quite similar to Worden’s four tasks.